Wednesday, December 12, 2007

American Christians - Can't They Do Something Right?

Yes, we've been stagnant lately. No, we don't care enough about you to make it happen more frequently. Get over it. If you want more updates in this blog, go ahead and write them yourself.

Unfortunately, recent events have caught our attention and made posting in this web publication necessary. Those who pay any attention at all to Important News are well aware of the War on Christmas. It has been a long, drawn-out war in which some people (read: The Jews) are trying to replace the friendliest greeting of the year, "Merry Christmas," with a weaker, more offensive substitute, "Go Die." It should be apparent to everyone with at least half a brain that these do not mean the same thing. Trying to replace our national tradition of wishing people a Merry Christmas when they buy our products is like trying to replace Uncle Sam with Tevye the Dairyman.
Recently, this crisis reached a head, as a small-minded Jew on the New York City subway responded to seasonal greetings of "Merry Christmas" with his own twisted "Happy Channukkah." The right-minded Christians, tired of the oppressive, Jewish atmosphere in Jew York City, attacked him. Luckily, they outnumbered him and his Jew-friends ten-to-three.
Problem solved, right? Historically, every time Jews have been outnumbered they've been beaten into submission. Unfortunately, this was not the case. First of all, it is certainly possible that these Christians were not devout enough. One of them said, "Oh, Hanukkah. That's the day that the Jews killed Jesus." This is incorrect. Good Friday is the day that the Jews killed Jesus. Know Your Facts.
Next, a Muslim man, a "student," intervened and held off many of the Christians until the Jew who made the inflammatory comment stopped the train. There is no further evidence necessary of the Jews' stranglehold on the New York underground. Nor of Muslims' brute force, the sort of thing that it can take years of our military's time to effectively combat. The police are charging the ten Christians, and they may even be charged with a hate crime.
Come on, American Jewry. Isn't enough enough? Can't you give up our nations subways, if only for the Christmas season? Please, we're trying to be civil: Stop this nonsense or we'll beat you up. If all you've got is Muslims on your side, you know everybody else hates you.

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