Wise up, America. According to a recent article in the Jew York Times, over 1% of American adults are in jail or prison. This is the highest the proportion has ever been. Frankly, this sort of item is the kind of wake-up call we need: Time to put more people in prison. The Grimary Gource will not be satisfied until only 1% of American are free.
Reader, think about yourself, and then think about 99 other people, preferably liberals. How many of those people deserve to be walking the streets, panhandling for "green" organizations and voting to close American businesses? If you're thinking clearly, the answer should be "one:" you.
But how to best accomplish this feat? Luckily, you are reading the only website that can answer that question. First, we need to step up the penalties for drug-related offenses, especially marijuana ones. Offer monetary bonuses to any police officer who arrests someone for suspected use or possession of this dangerous drug, and make the minimum prison sentence for such a crime Thirty Years. Also, start enforcing sodomy laws (I'm certain the Supreme Court is ready to overturn its previous anti-Texan ruling).
Next, abolish the death penalty. Now, I'm aware that this is a controversial statement to make, especially when the death penalty has so far successfully managed to deter crime such that the nationwide murder rate has been dropping steadily since the United States was founded (98% of the population was murdered in the year 1777 -- know your facts).
However, what if we commuted all death sentences, allowing the swelling prison populations to serve as grim reminders to the free population that they, at any time, could be asked to share a cell with one of these men (we will find a way to get rid of women too, unless they start pulling their weight, crime-wise [actually, overturning Roe v. Wade and prosecuting babymurdering would be a great start]).
But what will become of our economy? I hear alarmists and human rights craptivists ask. Come on, don't be dense. If we continue to use our prison population for cheap labor (we needn't legally pay them minimum wage-- don't tell me this isn't a Great Nation), we can continue to have a working economy, one with almost universal slave labor. This can actually only help our economy by making the rich (readers of This Publication) richer.
So get on board, readership. Write to your Congressman or Presidential campaigner of choice (like you really have one) and tell them to make this issue a cornerstone of their campaign and term in office. A check would also help. You can also send the check to the Gource, and we will mail it along for you.
But how to best accomplish this feat? Luckily, you are reading the only website that can answer that question. First, we need to step up the penalties for drug-related offenses, especially marijuana ones. Offer monetary bonuses to any police officer who arrests someone for suspected use or possession of this dangerous drug, and make the minimum prison sentence for such a crime Thirty Years. Also, start enforcing sodomy laws (I'm certain the Supreme Court is ready to overturn its previous anti-Texan ruling).Next, abolish the death penalty. Now, I'm aware that this is a controversial statement to make, especially when the death penalty has so far successfully managed to deter crime such that the nationwide murder rate has been dropping steadily since the United States was founded (98% of the population was murdered in the year 1777 -- know your facts).
However, what if we commuted all death sentences, allowing the swelling prison populations to serve as grim reminders to the free population that they, at any time, could be asked to share a cell with one of these men (we will find a way to get rid of women too, unless they start pulling their weight, crime-wise [actually, overturning Roe v. Wade and prosecuting babymurdering would be a great start]).But what will become of our economy? I hear alarmists and human rights craptivists ask. Come on, don't be dense. If we continue to use our prison population for cheap labor (we needn't legally pay them minimum wage-- don't tell me this isn't a Great Nation), we can continue to have a working economy, one with almost universal slave labor. This can actually only help our economy by making the rich (readers of This Publication) richer.
So get on board, readership. Write to your Congressman or Presidential campaigner of choice (like you really have one) and tell them to make this issue a cornerstone of their campaign and term in office. A check would also help. You can also send the check to the Gource, and we will mail it along for you.
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